“Dear Mama Let me first begin by saying, "I do love you." I just prefer to love you from a…”

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Dear Mama Let me first begin by saying, "I do love you." I just prefer to love you from afar now because I need to protect my sanity and inner peace. I do not like the person I become when I am around you. Because I choose to respect you while shunning your toxic behaviors, I keep my mouth quiet and simply remove myself from your presence or the present situation. But rest assured, I am fuming inside and my inner peace is sacrificed in the moment. I do not like your negative behaviors. Just because you are older than I am and most of the people in your usual company, does not give you the right to speak to us so rudely, so callously. You use no filters, and truly believe that you have the right to say whatever comes to your mind, regardless of how caustic or hurtful the comments may be. I learned at an early age that "Just because you can say/ do something, doesn't mean you should." That is obviously a lesson you have not mastered. What's more important, you perceive yourself to be the victim. What's even worse is that you have the audacity to gossip and bad mouth the same people who love you but who you treat with such disrespect. I feel at times I am the "mother" and you are the child." You ate the main person in the family going to church on Sundays and professing God's greatness, but you never practice the lessons you preach to your children and grandchildren. We look up to you to be a model for us and our lives. We have been disappointed hundreds of times. You embarrass us and our friends, our spouses, our children, and typically anyone in which you come in contact. I feel so sad for you because you are so miserable with the workings of life that you can not enjoy life. I am not sure where the problems stem, but I pray for you every day. It is embarrassing to travel anyplace with you because we never know what you are going to say, and to whom you might say it. We defend you at times, even when we know we should not. We have gotten into several conflicts on your behalf, only to have you verbally assault us as a result. Your grandchildren do not want to visit, despite our encouragement. The are truly afraid of you and do not see you as a MeMa. I continue to pray for you and positive change. Love, The Daughter You Disowned

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