“To My Dearest Wife, I suppose you know that I'm frequently unhappy. And I think we both know that…”

To My Dearest Wife, I suppose you know that I'm frequently unhappy. And I think we both know that likely due to the fact, in part, that I likely suffer from depression. But, there is a little more to the story. I often find myself feeling dissatisfied with our sex life. I don't want to ever say anything about it because I know you would immediately think it has something to do with me not finding you attractive. And that really has nothing to do with it. I think really has to do with the fact that I grew up in an environment where I felt constant shame over my feelings & desires for physical involvement. Consequently, I feel like there are so many experiences I never got to have. And even though it's been years, I'm still curious what it would be like to have other partners. It also drives me crazy to know that you were able to do all that stuff I wanted to do when you were younger. Perhaps this all sounds juvenile & foolish. And to some extent it is. That's probably part of my reluctance to talk about it. And I don't want to have an affair. I just want you to be able to understand how I'm feeling. Your Loving Husband